Glimpses of God's grace as experienced through the eyes of a pilgrim pastor.
Tuesday, June 17, 2014
Breaking the News
After almost 2 years of marriage and 5 years of being in relationship, it's no secret that Stephen and I operate at different speeds.
Whether it is our day-to-day activities, the way we go about our work, or the method in which we make decisions, we move in vastly different ways.
My main speed would be fast.
Stephen moves at a slower pace.
At times we appreciate each other's speed and the way tasks and work gets done. On many Saturdays as we're both getting ready for church the next day, it's not uncommon for Stephen to be working much of the day right up to his evening service. Whereas I have finished the same number of tasks (and sometimes more) in half the amount of time.
But there are times I look at the quality of work Stephen has created and the time put in and I'm envious. Our lawn and landscaping are far better for Stephen's hands rather than mine.
And then there is the decision making. Sometimes I'm still amazed that at 11 months of dating, Stephen asked me to marry him! He's very thorough and takes his time researching and figuring out the best options. He decides with his head. I go with my heart.
We both had talked about a dog for a while before we were living in a house. And when the perfect dog (the one I couldn't stop thinking about) came into our lives, I was ready! A year later, Stephen still wonders about whether we should have adopted a dog!
It was never more evident how different Stephen and I are than when we shared with our families that we were expecting a child.
We found out we were pregnant at 6 weeks. A week later my mom was coming to visit for Holy Week and Easter. So we would tell her in person.
I had found the perfect gift years ago (just waiting for that special occasion): an "I love you Grandma" book. Before she arrived I wrapped it and it waited for her arrival. To get to Missouri, my mom has an 11 hour drive from Ohio. She made the trip in one day, a very long day. She arrived just before Stephen had to attend a meeting at church.
She was getting the gift upon arrival. He would have to wait.
We all greeted one another at the car and carried her bags inside. She wasn't even sitting down, hadn't really dropped her purse or anything and I said, "We have a gift for you!"
Here it is.
Open it now.
"Can I sit down first?" she asks.
No, open it now. It's a gift for you.
She's standing in our entrance. We're all waiting anxiously.
And she's tired from her long drive.
My mom unwraps the gift and sees a baby book - "I always liked these books. Wait, does this mean?"
Yes, I'm pregnant!
A few weeks later it would be time for us to share our news with Stephen's parents.
Stephen's parents were set to visit the first week in May. Again, we wanted to share our news in person. They flew to Missouri from Maryland. Upon arrival we met them at the airport and had some activities planned for the day. Stephen had it all figured out how we would share with his parents in the evening while his sister and uncle were on the phone. He even created a picture with our current "Works in Progress" - the '72 Suburban, our dog, and our first ultrasound. The pictures were wrapped and at the appointed time Stephen would send a picture via email to his uncle and sister.
Finally. The time came to make the phone calls and to share the news. We were gathered in our living room. Stephen dialed his sister and uncle and we were all talking together across three different states. I wasn't in charge of how to share the news - otherwise, as soon as the phones were answered, I would have shared.
No, we talked about our day.
How the trip went so far.
Our plans for the weekend.
How everyone was doing.
All the while I'm just sitting on the couch waiting to scream our good news!
I should have known that Stephen would work on his own time. But we had news of a baby to share!
Finally. After all the questions were exhausted and Stephen's dad was falling asleep in the recliner from the day, Stephen says, 'Well, we have some news to share. Mom and dad have a gift here to open and I sent you a picture. Everyone can open it now."